When Rest is not Restful

So I am coming to the end of a week of work. I have slept anywhere between 9 and 12 hours each night, depending on how I felt. I have not had to attend to client work all week. Granted both my wife and I (we run the businesss together) have had to occasionally jump into help staff members. But not too frequently and not for very long.

Yet after all of this, I do not feel rested.

The Problem of Fibromyalgia and Rest

One of the main downsides of having Fibromyalgia is that we don’t get good quality, deep sleep. The length of time is almost irrelevant if it doesn’t have any intrisic value. This means I can sleep 6 hours and wake up in pain and with muscle stiffness, or I can sleep 10 hours with exactly the same outcome. I usually have to take pain killing medication just before bed to try to reduce the chance of waking up in really bad pain, but it doesn’t always work.

People rest in different ways. Some like to spend time with friends, or out walking or shopping. Being an Introvert, I prefer time alone (or just with my other half), some quiet time and some gaming time. But you see, I can have time blogging, gaming, or writing some story or other and I end up with the same level of chronic fatigue and muscle tension as I do on a day’s work.

So whether I work, or I play, I feel the same.

One Positive Noticeable Effect of Resting

Now I’m towards the end of a week off, I am only taking 2-3 doses of painkillers per day, rather than the 3-4 I was taking during a working days. Part of that might be I’m now only having one or 2 cups of coffee a day, rather than the minimum of 4 I have pre-1pm in the office. A major part will be definitely reduced stress – clients and staff are not breaking my concetration every half an hour.

So despite me not feeling like I’ve had rest there are still noticeable impacts.

And I Have Still Rested

I have to drill this into my thick skull. It is irrelevant how I feel about the rest, the fact still remains I have had down-time. This has meant:

• I have been able to persue personal projects
• I have had plenty of gaming time
• The house is in a semi-decent state
• I have slept until my body chooses to wake up, rather than when the alarm goes off

All these things have value. Yes I still very much feel like my muscles are just as bad. Mood-wise I’m not much different, to be honest. I’m sat here now and my shoulder muscles are awful, with the pain creeping up into my neck and head. But have I been stressed today? No. Have I been able to control my pain levels? Just about.

Therefore, no matter what my brain is telling me, I have had a day of rest. It’s just a shame I won’t feel rested come Tuesday next week when I go back to work. But with Fibromyalgia, I’m not really in control of that.